This song is perfect for how I feel tonight, I do believe. I wrote this on my other site which is even more new than this site…so I thought I would repost it here… Just in case anyone thinks I am a blogger who only blogs when they want… I blog daily… But a big issue came up and I was focused on it… When suddenly, I realized the wounds here are very raw. But after writing it, I have made my mind up: the abuser will not take my voice or my writing away from me. So I do expect to have posts up tonight regarding domestic violence. For now, and for those interested, I’ll post a semi personal post up…and hope it sheds a bit of light as to why I struggled so. If you read, thank you!
I am passionate about many topics and regarding most of them I have been impacted in one way or another personally by the cause I support. I’ve seen horrible things done by police, I’ve seen how the system doesn’t care or work for the people, I’ve had a hard personal life… But I can still write on all topics with anger and passion… Except, apparently, one. That one is domestic abuse and violence. I have in the past written on these topics but I had removed myself from the home I had grown up in and though I was in an abusive relationship myself at the time, I could still write with furious passion about it. Now that I have moved back and am living next door to my parents, I have frozen up when it comes to writing about abuse. Why? Because the 40+ years of severe abuse she has lived, is still going, only stronger than ever…and I feel like a child again. A helpless child. I am trying to help her get out, but if I can’t help my own mother, how can I expect my writings to help anyone? Obviously, I am not doing something right. I’ve been trying for 20 some odd years now, since I was a little kid, to help my mom. She took me in when my birth parents bailed, many, many times…and not once did she have to. She did her best and she is my reason for breathing…but I am lacking money to help. I suppose writing about abuse makes the reality I am living in -yet again; just as I did all of my life-, hurt even more as I can write all day but it is not saving her.
Continue reading Refusing to Allow the Abuser the Ability to Steal My Voice!