Category Archives: Domestic Abuse & Violence

Stop the Violence! Please Share- Newark, NJ, NAVC Rally July 19, 2017 !

Something worth fighting for… If you are in or around Newark, NJ, or if you can make it out for this, please do come out and join; or at the least please share the message with others who may can make it, in a united effort thanks to the efforts of Newark Anti-Violence Coalition (NAVC) in standing up for the people and the community; helping put an end to violence…

newark black on black violence police violence newark anti-violence

“The mighty Newark Anti-Violence Coalition (NAVC) is calling on 10,000 Strong! On Wednesday, July 19, 2017 at 6:00pm in Newark, NJ in the middle of Broad and Market Streets (Downtown Newark). We will condemn the recent spate of violence in the city by holding a mass rally against all forms of violence (i.e. Domestic Violence, Black on Black Violence, Police Violence, etc) the influx of assault rifles, and proliferation of drugs in Black and Brown communities.

Also, we are calling for Black people to get organize for BLACK POWER and for people to get organize for people power. Joining in solidarity with us will be community activists, community organizations, community organizers, progressives, educators, clergy members, the youth, Pan-Afrikanists, revolutionaries, street organizations, parents, students, and you!

PLEASE PASS THIS TEXT TO ALL SOCIAL MEDIA AND TEXT 10 PEOPLE. THIS TEXT MUST CIRCULATE TO ALL CELL PHONES. “

Help Me Fight Abuse and Domestic Violence! Urgent!!

I was given a miracle in the form of a dear friend whom I call my family. There is no way to thank this soul for their kindness…I can only hope they know how thankful I am for their care and help…. Currently, I am in need of a little money to escape the place I currently am. My sweet friend saw the abuses and wanted to help me get back to safety. In addition, knowing how deeply I desire to help others he put together a perfect GoFundMe page in my name, and I couldn’t be more honored or thankful…

I hate asking for help, I hate asking for money, but I am in a desperate situation and if anyone can find it in their hearts to help, I’ll do anything possible as my thanks… Additionally, the entire money isn’t just for me; once I’m back in safety I plan on helping other survivors and/or victims of abuse. This is a horrific tragedy that has been going on for far too long; it has been kept a secret for far too long; in far too many houses… Please, please share or if you can even a dollar helps… Thank you for reading; I would appreciate even just a share…. Thank you all again; I appreciate all of you…

Help Save Lives Impacted by Domestic Violence HERE

Plans for Resource Pages for Victims of Domestic Abuse & The Like

Over the next week I will be working on numerous projects as well as attending some personal business, but as I can, I am working on putting up more info, resources, links, hotlines, shelter locations and the like for abused women and men in North America as well as all over the world.

Right now both pages are a bit of a mess, please bare with me as I do this. Regardless of where you are from, if you have a page I either have not listed or probably would not know about regarding abuse, rape, abortion (helpful pro-abortion ONLY) please comment or email for it to be included…

I have been impacted pretty much by everything I write about on this site in one way or another. I also know how hard it is to find resources, especially when in distress. My hope and goal for the pages on my site are to provide a “one stop” for people in need. Please bare with me as I work on building these pages up.

In the near future, I will be creating a “sister” page to this site dedicated solely to racism, the prison industry and the war on the people, aka, the war on drugs as well as drug and legal information. One step further, I also would like a mental health page up….But one step at a time, aye? 🙂

Thanks again to all the readers who have stayed with me as I have been going through this silent spell, and a huge thanks to the new ones also… I will return to my normal writing self soon, hopefully with a lot of improvements!

 

Officer on Paid Leave After Assaulting Pregnant Wife

This makes me sick; all that I write on pretty much does because it shows society’s ugly side, but it hits home a bit too much. And it is an open dismissal of violence against women, if you ask me.

Quincy Police Captain Michael Miller has been put on a paid vacation aka administrative leave after being charged with aggravated assault…against his former wife, who is 9 months pregnant. Apparently, this cop went to pick up his five year old daughter Friday when the assault happened. Details to my knowledge have not been released yet.

At 4 in the afternoon the police received the phone call for a domestic violence dispute. Later that day, his former wife filed a restraining order against Miller. Chief Keenan claimed: Continue reading Officer on Paid Leave After Assaulting Pregnant Wife

The Judgmental and the Survivors- Be Proud Survivors

This post is really no different from any other post I write; it’s all about judgmental people, and hoping that within my battle, you will find a reminder or anything positive (I hope this so much) to help you know you’re a) not alone and b) not anywhere near what they want you to think you are. You are a strong being, a strong soul that has survived things they could never understand. The strong one here is you; not the ones who make fun or try to make those who are already down feel even worse.

Be proud of who you are… I am still working on that myself to be honest… But in regards to my mental health, childhood and scars from years of self-injury, I am NOT ashamed.

Excellent Resource for Abused Women Internationally!

I am working on so many projects at the moment… But this is vital information, I believe. It is an international website with abundant information for victims of both rape and/or domestic abuse. The website is called the “International Directory of Domestic Violence Agencies”, it is available in over 100 languages. Whether you are in America, England, Cairo; wherever, this website is full of information regarding things such as your legal rights regarding domestic violence and much, much more.

I plan on finally updating the domestic violence *page* at the top ^ with a lot of other resources and summaries of each state’s laws regarding domestic violence, but until then I truly believe this is a website vital to all women AND men 🙂 check it out by clicking HERE.

Aprox. 90 precent of Women in Prison as of 2008 are in for Killing Abusive Partner – While Abusers Get Little to No Time

“The average prison sentence for men who kill their intimate partners is 2 to 6 years. Women who kill their partners are sentenced, on average, to 15 years.

A pair of Maryland cases vividly illustrates this inequality in sentencing. In one case, a judge in Baltimore County, Maryland sentenced Kenneth Peacock to 18 months for killing his unfaithful wife. The very next day, another judge in the same county sentenced Patricia Ann Hawkins to three years in prison for killing her abusive husband. Significantly, the prosecutor in the Peacock case requested a sentence twice as long as the one imposed, while the prosecutor in the Hawkins case requested one-third of the sentence imposed.”

“As many as 90% of the women in prison today [2008] for killing men had been battered by those men.”

Go here for more info and on what you can do.
~ The Michigan Women’s Justice & Clemency Project

Domestic Abuse: She Won’t Listen to Me… Maybe You Will & Save Yourself, and Your Children, From Suffering More…

I know there are plenty of reasons women stay in abusive relationships (and I know the same for men in these relationships- I refer to women for this is a personal post to me, but abuse on men is just as wrong and detrimental). I know there is nothing I can do or say that will make someone open their eyes and see what is on the other side of life, that after you get through the terrifying “what if” and “is it me” “am I crazy” “what about money and the children” or “what about our safety?” and the countless other responses that are legitimate in the hearts of those saying it. They also may be legitimate concerns all around; but at the end of the day we have to take a risk or it is clear what will change…and that’s nothing.
Continue reading Domestic Abuse: She Won’t Listen to Me… Maybe You Will & Save Yourself, and Your Children, From Suffering More…

Not Going To Let The Government Break My Spirit (bit personal..again.)

This morning I found out some very disheartening, disappointing, sad and a bit scary news regarding “a” domestic violence case. Though deep down this verdict was expected, I didn’t anticipate it being THIS dismissed. They didn’t read my statement or ask questions. The judge simply came in, said he had the authority to over rule the DA and was doing so.

The DA had suggested probation, fine and anger managment (that last part is funny to me- abusers don’t change). The judge dismissed punishment because of his age, not taking into consideration or not CARING that he is the same age as the woman he has been severely and sickeningly been abusing for over 40 years. His other reason was because he “hadn’t been in trouble before”….

There is a reason he had never been “in trouble” before and that is because he used to be a “high” ranking and respected member of law enforcement. Anytime there was suspicions and police were ordered to speak to the abused, he always managed to remove the investigation request, so no one every came to speak.

Now he is older and retired but he is also more sick of an abuser now than he has been in about 20 years. No one was ever brave enough to call the police and make a statement. Though I am not a police fan due to their tendency to be killers and abusers themselves, I knew this had to be documented so I am the one who called the police and filed the statement which landed him in jail and court, yes, for the first time.

Had the judge asked, he would have known he had never been in trouble because no one was willing to go against him in the years past. So the verdict is, guilty, as he had already plead guilty

The judge gave him a fine and that’s it. Another day of punishing no real crime.

I had expected he wouldnt get all the DA had proposed but nothing other than a small fine, is devastating, but consistent with American law. I will say one more thing and then move on. This ruling cuts deep to me & of course her. It is, as said, another reminder of our failure of a legal system; one which does not care for anyone but men; white, mid to upper class men. Or “one of their own” aka the “law enforcement”… This was something very personal to me, more than I will say, and it has now fallen apart in seconds, and has hit home so hard.

HOWEVER!

As much as I would like to go to sleep and hide, I won’t. It isn’t even an option. For through this insane, unjust ruling, I have been reminded (again, not that I needed to be reminded) that the American legal system is unjust, biased, prejudice and we all need to be raising hell and not resting until positive change occurs.

Here in America, they give harsher time and puinshment to the undeserving i.e., drug “offenders”, computer activists while letting true criminals (i.e., pedophiles, abusers, killers, rapists) walk away too often with a slap on the wrist in comparison; if they even do that.

I am sure most if not all countries are the same when it comes to punishment for domestic abuse & violence.

So in posts to come I will be researching where other countries stand regarding spousal abuse, but first I am going to focus on America. I am also going to get a better layout soon, so different topics will be easier to find.

And with that I end by saying… My fight against domestic violence/abuse has always been “on”- but now it is a priority- I’m fed up up with how women are treated be it not helping save women’s lives or trying to take our rights away, such as abortion. Or politicians saying we ask for rape or because we are women, that’s “what we are here for.”

Just as I fight against racism and police brutality, I now have an equally sized flame of rage for the mistreatment of women, the lack of respect and care from the government & society alike. I am off to study laws and psychological profiles of abusers. I think I may even make a new page solely for this research and resources for abused women. Either way, I am using the injustice given out today to motivate me and fuel my anger, nothing will stop me from fighting for what I believe in, and nothing will stop me from fighting those who threaten any of us. Long ago I dedicated my life to the struggle because Tupac helped me see the truth. And to this day, I will honor that promise I made but with more passion and more dedication than ever before.

The government is hurting us. Put race, gender, sexual preferences, religion, etc aside and get along to demand justice that is rightfully ours. Unite against the real enemies! Stop hating one another and wasting time… There are too many real and threatening laws and issues to waste time. That doesn’t mean give up your passion; I simply wish everyone of every background would take a few moments out of their life to do their part. Educate themselves and then others. We have to stop accepting these unjust laws, racism, sexism, police brutality, the horrific war on drugs and prison system…. Stop accepting life how it is and start working to try and make it better; how it should be.

Whatever it is, just do your part… We all have one.

Domestic Abuse… Why Does She (or He) Stay ? (Once More, A Bit Personal…)

*Notice: I have spent a lot of time thinking about how I want to approach these posts regarding domestic abuse, and I think I will be writing a bit differently when posting them. The facts are still very much raw wounds to me, and the wounds are deepened daily. I am not in danger myself anymore, but the person I love is. However, I refuse to leave until she comes with me. So to conclude…I will write a bit different anytime I speak of domestic abuse… It has forever been, in one way or another, an on going issue. Soon, I hope that changes.*

                     Now on to the post!

Two things I hate hearing when speaking of domestic abuse… “If he is so horrible why does she* stay? He seems like a nice guy to me, he wouldn’t hurt a fly!  Or, the even worse, “He may lose his temper or have lost his temper with her, but she hasn’t left him, so he couldn’t be THAT bad of a guy.”

Come to think of it, there are quiet a few things I hate hearing regarding abuse; most of them said by people who have never lived in an abusive household or relationship.

Back to the topic of this post… Why does she stay?

I can’t speak for everyone, only speak from what I know, have seen and from research. So first I want to say… just like with having a loved one fall into addiction, I know it is beyond depressing and frustrating to watch a loved one stay in an abusive relationship. No matter what “kind” of abuse; be it emotional/mental/verbal abuse, financial abuse, sexual abuse or physical abuse…it is almost harder on the loved ones who have to see it happening than to the victim, because there is really nothing much for the “watchers” to do.

After so many years of seeing abuse, Continue reading Domestic Abuse… Why Does She (or He) Stay ? (Once More, A Bit Personal…)